Several weeks ago, I received an email from a friend, who related her cousin was now in hospice care. Her cousin, who was a former active youth in the temple where I originally started, was now in her early 50’s and living successfully in Northern California. I met her accidentally while shopping in our area a few years ago. She had come with her husband to Stanford Hospital to be treated for her cancer. She was optimistic about her treatment. We communicated off and on even as she struggled with her process. Then, last year, after I was diagnosed with cancer and began chemotherapy treatments, we shared our concerns and struggles. We mutually supported and encouraged each other in our common struggle.

When I received the notice of her in hospice care, I wrote her late that evening. I was, however, preoccupied with the funeral I was to officiate the following day so I was going to mail her the letter after the funeral. Following the funeral the next day, I opened my email and her cousin notified me she had died early that day. Needless to say, I was surprised she died so quickly. As much as her time was limited, I felt I could send the letter with ample time.

A week later, I participated in her funeral with of sadness and sorrow. Still, in my dharma talk, I shared the letter with her family and relatives. Here are the thoughts shared.

Dear Y,

I received an email from your cousin, A, today. She informed me that you are in hospice care. I was, of course, saddened to hear of your present condition, but my thoughts and prayers are with you and J (husband).

I am sure this illness in your journey has been difficult and unpredictable at times. Good times and bad times are all compressed in such a short time. But, I am sure you will generally agree that your life as you have received it, as much as possible, was and is filled with love, laughter, and a wide range of deeply felt experiences, especially with J and all your loved ones. They have always been a deep part of your life in good and bad times, as you have been there for them also. And, even now, I am sure you deeply feel the love that surrounds you and embraces you from their heart.

As you continue to receive loving support from J and your family, my prayer is that you are settled in your faith - a faith that was promised to you before you were born even or aware of, a faith reaching you through the compassionate heart of Amida Buddha’s vow. This vow promises to enfold you without abandoning you. No matter what life condition you are in, Amida’s compassionate heart calls you to come forth as you are. You don’t have to change anything in your life. Just as you are, in whatever way you hold your life in your heart and mind, Amida embraces you. Amida Buddha is your ultimate shelter and spiritual home. Serenity and peace within brings Amida’s bright light of compassion to you and surrounds your whole being throughout all your changes. In this compassionate light there are no borders between this life and the life to come in the Pure Land of enlightenment.

Be at peace and fully receive all the love and care from J and your loved ones and when the time comes feel free to let go and go with Amida’s compassionate heart and light. Know that you and your loved ones will all meet and continue to meet in this circle of faith called Namu-Amida-Butsu. Simply embrace Namu-Amida-Butsu as this name enfolding your life and the life of your loved ones in this boundless circle of lasting compassion and wisdom.

One of my favorite verses goes:
If you yearn for me
Say Namu-amida-butsu,
For I too live forever
In this six syllable name -- Na-mu-A-mi-da-Butsu.

With palms together in gassho,